A special gift
Somebody signed me up for some samples that arrived in a package labeled "The FREE Sample you requested from walmart.com is here!" I was pretty excited because I didn't actually remember asking for any free stuff.
Amber found the package and insisted on opening it herself. I was excited to get something for free, and she was curious to know what I had ordered myself.
After opening the package, she had that "we need to talk" look on her face.
I'm not really sure how you're supposed to explain to your wife, should the day ever come, that Serenity Male Guards are the new necessity from Wal-Mart, but that wasn't the case today. So um.. thanks for that stimulating conversation with my bride.
I wasn't too sure what to do with this generous gift at first, but I've put my mind to the task. These things must be useful for something. Maybe so, but aside from
1. being able to drive extra-long hours should I desire to kill an astronaut in Houston, or
2. the possibility that I might develop menstrual issues, or
3. fitting in with the "under 3" crowd at church;
I can't think of any use for these things.
Thanks again. Really... from the bottom of my heart. And if you should ever need some special absorbent pads "anatomically designed for men," give me a shout. I'll keep 'em in the glove box.
7 comments:
dude, serious question. My jaw is starting to lock up. I can barely get two fingers in my mouth. If I loose the ability to eat again I'm screwed. What do i do?
Hey Buddy,
Hope you like your gift. When I picked you up at the bus station a month ago I noticed you were wettin' you pants, so being a good friend like I am I decided to help you out. Hope it does the trick!
You say that bus station. You would have done the same had you been wandering around that place.
Glad to see I'm not the only one who doesn't remember needing a little extra protection.
(thanks mark)
the courage you have shown in confronting such a personal issue is admirable. i wish you the best of luck in what lies ahead.
with the support of your wife, i know you will overcome this challenge.
we're behind you buddy, you can do it.
Hey that enlarged prostate is nothing to joke about! Better get it drained in whatever matter is necessary.
One use for the guards, going to a ballgame and not wanting to miss any action after drinking, or is it renting, all that beer.
It is a possibility.
Hilarious.
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